1 step forward a million steps back

not wrote a blog for a few days cos my head is spinning. this is gonna be one of those ones where i dont write nonsense, where i dont write about a dog in a hat, where i spill the contents of my silly little head.

i am sad, feeling down, not knowing where i am going, i am winding myself up over things i cant control and wondering where all my confidence has gone. i am wondering where it all went wrong. what i did wrong and why i cant get this one thing out of my head. why am i so bothered about it? why do i feel so lonely? why do i still want back the one thing that has made me hurt so much for the last month?

i need to get away, meet new people, see new things. i need to get a good nights sleep and forget it all, i need to not write shit like this and make myself look like a pathetic fool.

i need aims and goals and to find myself again. i need a haircut. i need to get off facebook where i endlessly look to see what is going on, or where i put out some vaguely disguised depressing self pitying status in the hope i will get a text asking if i am ok. i really should delete all this but i still want someone to reach out to me and tell me its all gonna be ok and the time i needed has passed.

this is a cat in a hat

he looks rather dapper